13.1.....

i am officially registered to run my first half marathon!!! on the one foot, I can't believe it and at the same time I am super excited! two of my neighbors will be running it too, so we all plan to head there together. whether we will run together is questionable....based on our varying pace times.
now...the funny thing (or not so funny really) is that I'm icing my foot as I type this blog. yes, that's right....my foot, not my knee. i did a challenging 6.5 mile run on Sunday....and felt great afterward. yesterday afternoon while walking to pick up Andrew from school, I felt this intense pain in my foot. it then became worse and began to radiate up through my heel and into the back of my ankle. by the end of the day, I couldn't put weight on the foot without feeling a lot of pain. hoping it was nothing, I iced it last night and took advil. i was super excited when i didnt feel pain upon waking up this morning. well....that lasted about 5 minutes....and then the pain was there.....and it was BAD!!! I quickly found a podiatrist that took my insurance (thank god for the internet!!!) and was luckily able to take someone's cancelled appt this morning. long story short.....I am developing plantar fasciatis. doc gave me some immediate things to help with the pain and then sent me back to the running store to buy inserts for my shoes. the inserts make me feel like i am walking on pillows.....they are awesome! and the best part....they've helped minimize the pain!
so....no running for a little while....until I'm 90% pain free....docs orders! but as long as I don't have pain, I can walk, bike and do the elliptical. hmmmm.....this sounds all too familiar to my knee rehab not too long ago!!! if it's not one thing it's another, right!?!?
but....I am DETERMINED to do this half marathon!!! (disclaimer for mom and dad who are certainly putting on their parenting caps right now.....i will be smart and take it easy. i promise I will only work within my limits!)

so....who wants to join me or come cheer me on?????

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new day

today is a new day. the sun is shining (well, it's actually pretty overcast!)....the birds are chirping, and both boys are still asleep at 7:15am. today is a new day. I will approach it that way. open mind...positive attitude....and unconditional love for my children.

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therapy through typing

today my child told me he hates me. he told me he doesn't love me. he told me I'm stupid. he told me these things not once, not twice. to be honest I don't know how many times he told me. I stopped counting a long time ago. guess it's my way of denying that these things are happening in my own family. between my own child and me. does he do it because he's an angry boy? is he a sad child? i don't think he really feels these things. there's something else he's trying to communicate. but what is it? things had gotten so much better the first half of the school year. I really thought we had turned a corner. things are now back to the way they were before he started kindergarten. why? I shake my head and ask myself this question all day. especially at night. that's when it's the worst. I'm typing this at night because my emotions are so fresh, so raw. the whole day bubbles and bubbles in my body until I can't take it anymore. so I write. I don't write because I want attention. i don't write because i want to hear a million suggestions of what we could be doing differently. I write because it's my therapy. I write because it helps me step out of that denial and face the truth. I am fed up and all I know to do is write.

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